Valentine, Galentine or Palentine

It's almost here! The day so many people look forward to each year.. The day of wine and roses. And chocolates galore! The romantic dinner and dancing. The beautiful new outfits. Life just couldn't be better.

It's almost here! The day so many people dread each year. The day of sorrow and sadness.  Memories of happier times and days gone by. Memories of spouses now deceased. Memories of sweet times stolen by dementia. Thoughts and worry of spouses deployed.

Which day is almost here for you? For me, it's somewhere in the middle. Thankfully I haven't lost a spouse to death or dementia, nor is he deployed to another country. He is however absent for the day. Working on assignment hundreds of miles away. SO, he won't be coming through the door with a vase of roses and a box of chocolates.  The best it get's will be a delivering guy from the florist. And that's OK. I'm thankful he has a job. But what will I do while others are out celebrating Valentines? Well I have choices!

Galentines! I just heard this term a few days away. Self explanatory.  Gals, all without a guy for whatever reason, get together and celebrate one another in whatever season of life you are in. Dress up! Go out to dinner. Have a glass of wine. Bring chocolates for everyone. A flower for everyone. Voila! Wonderful memories made with those you care about.

And Palentines?  (I just made that word up). Well it's the same only shared with friends of both genders. Don't leave the guy pals to bring all of the flowers and chocolates either. Pals are equals! Gals do your part.

Now, while there is never anything wrong with planning some fun for ourselves and friends, lets keep in mind those who may be drenched in sadness. In this instance I am referring to the widows. (James 1:27).  Although not all widows are elderly, many are. They find themselves alone after having been blessed with marriage for decades. This can be a time of such sadness. They can even wonder sometimes why they are still here on earth in their advanced age. Honestly many of them would much rather be reunited in Heaven with their beloved.
Although we can never replace their loss, we can help to diminish their sadness, if only for a short time. Most often, it doesn't take a lot to bring joy to an elderly persons life. They have learned to live with less.  Less material things. Less company. Less activity. Most are easily satisfied.

These are some very simple ways to take a widows mind off of the fact that her beloved is no longer with her:

Take her some flowers, or A flower.  Less is more most often.

Chocolates, or sugar free chocolates. Again, a very few is better than the giant box we think we have to have.

Dinner, out OR in. She may or may not even be able to go out anymore. If she is, a restaurant or someones home. If not, bring dinner for the both of you to where she is, and by all means stay a while and visit. Elderly people love to visit and talk about the past.

On a more larger scale, host a number of widows for lunch. If your home isn't large enough, consider renting a venue or host at a church.  Recruit some help with cooking and serving. Teens are great for this. Find a few drivers to pick your guests up for the evening. Have the driver present them with a flower upon arrival and escort them in. Dress up for the occasion. Suits for the chauffeurs. Black pants and white shirts for the waitstaff. Dresses for the hostess. Sandwiches and fruit can keep the menu simple and affordable. Name plates for the tables. Linen clothes and napkins.
Even a 2 hour luncheon will surely brighten these folks day and bring a smile where there may not have been one.

Are you without a sweetheart this Valentines? I'd love to hear how you spent your time in the comments.

Remember to always Be Prepared To Bless.

Cards, A Lost Art !

My youngest daughter Stormie just loves to visit her Gran for many reasons.  One being that Gran collects, well, everything!  She has a 100+ year old home filled with "stuff'" all about the same age. Storm loves to look and touch everything because it is all things you just don't see anywhere else except maybe the antique store.

One of my daughters favorite things to look through is a box of greeting cards that Gran has kept and some that even came with the house.  There are cards for all seasons, occasions, thank you's and cards just for notes.  Storm reads them all each time we visit. They are all written in beautiful cursive handwriting. Something else that we are losing, but that's another story in itself.

When Stormie had her first birthday I sent thank you cards to everyone. I feared that maybe in the excitement of it all I had failed to have her say the words "thank you" to each person and I wanted everyone to know that we recognized their gift and how much we appreciated them celebrating with us and also how much she enjoyed playing with the gift that she had received. She is about to have her 11th birthday and we have done this each year.  We not only thank folks for the gifts but we thank them for simply showing up for the party, calling, sending a card or any other gesture that they may have chosen to do. We do this by sending cards. 

As I had for the past MANY years with my older two children, when Stormie's first Christmas came around we gathered, took a family picture (I think the older ones may have hated it by then), and then I made a card to send to everyone in my address book. We got several cards in return for a while but as the years have passed, the number of cards that we receive  have dwindled considerably.

We send cards for just about every occasion now. Most are handmade. Some are made more "professionally" with stamps, die cuts, card stock, embellishments etc.  Some are just a piece of printer paper folded in half and half again.  Stormie draws on them with crayons, pencils and markers.  She also uses stickers.  She cuts out pictures from magazines and glues them in or whatever suits her fancy at the time.

Cards are a lost art. People mostly just send an emoji by text or attach a pic they have downloaded from google to a Facebook post. But what about the dear family and friends who don't have cell phones or Facebook.

This is where we can truly bless others.

We can start with our family and friends first. Let the children make any kind of creation and send it the old fashion way to folks that can only get mail the old fashion way. I promise it will bless their hearts.  So many people are lonely and receiving a card or short note in the mail would surely make for a much brighter day in their lives. It doesn't have to be elaborate or perfect. That is why I believe handmade is best. The person receiving it knows that another human put a little time and thought into it and their little hands scribbled a note in their own handwriting.

I hope that you will give some thought and consideration to showering others with blessings in an old fashion way.

Stormie and I participate in card drives each year.  At Valentines we usually contribute about 300 cards to a drive that distributes to children in hospitals.  At Christmas we contribute to a drive that sends to nursing homes, knowing that our card may be the only card an elderly person gets that Christmas.  We also send to orphanages around the world.

When the time comes, I will share the information about these drives and hope that you will consider participating.  NO, you do not need to make 300 cards.  1 single card would make a difference. But for now my prayer is that you will start with those close to you, the ones that you already know and love and build from there. Get a calendar, write birthdays for those you know, then, make a note on the calendar a week or so prior to the birth date and start making the card and get it in the mail so that the recipient will receive it on time. The calendar will help you Be Prepared To Bless.

Blessings,

Johnna and Stormie

Stormie's First Card